Let Go Of Judgement

Transcript

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Let’s talk about something a little bit dark. Because there are dark parts of humanity as Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn wrote “the line of good and evil strikes down in every person’s heart, dividing every man’s heart”.

I want to talk to you about these examples of powerful people and when powerful people fall.

So for example with Harvey Weinstein I might judge him and say “Look at this creep, this disgusting man. He had all this power in his hands and he abused it. He took advantage of his situation. He had power over others. Power over people’s livelihoods and careers and he used it to appease his own short term sexual pleasures.”

It might seem quite disgusting. Well it probably is disgusting.

But I can stand here and I can judge a man like that.

But the fact is I had no idea what it’d be like to be in that sort of position. Can you imagine if people had to come to you to advance in their careers? If you were the difference between them working as a waitress the rest of their lives struggling in obscurity, or literally becoming multimillionaires…you being that kind of gatekeeper?

Of course you have your own desires.

Would you be so fine, would I be so fine to resist the temptation to do something bad on a whim?

I could judge a person like that, I probably have in the past. If I investigate myself, if I explore my knowledge of myself and try to figure out what kind of person I am. To look at my own character, to judge my own integrity. Wonder what I would do in that situation?

After having done that kind of analysis I couldn’t say if I would do the same in his position.

So here’s the thing. If I spend my time judging other people maybe even feeling angry about other people in positions of power, I might waste a lot of time.

But if I spend my time trying to develop my own character, then I can get all of these rewards.

The rewards of being a person who knows himself, who knows his own limits. The price is letting go of judgment. The reward is discernment. I assure you my friends this is a case where the reward far exceeds the price.

We can let go of our judgment and focus on our own characters. Be discerning, be upstanding in our own lives. And we don’t have to waste so much energy thinking about what others would do.

When I as in the temple in Wat Tham Krabok, near Saraburi in Thailand, I noticed so often that the head monks would say this phrase. Its quite common in Thailand and quite frustrating, or it can be. The phrase is “up to you.” So, it’s your decision.

Even sometimes the monks would probably know what the right decision was and they would tell us “it’s up to you.” Its your decision what to do with your life, they can offer you guidance and they give you enough space to make your own decisions.

It was quite remarkable being there and noticing how much these monks embodied this idea. Sometimes there would be some disturbance in the temple.

For example, someone went out to the nearby town and couldn’t resist drinking a bottle of whiskey. Came back to the temple very drunk. It disturbed some of us and that fellow went to go sleep it off.

I remember one person who was staying in the temple said “There should be a no tolerance policy. That fellow should be kicked out of the temple. Rules are rules.”

What he doesn’t understand are rules are for oneself. Standards are for oneself and you don’t need to worry. It sounds like something which might put more pressure on you but actually when you fully explore it, it’s quite liberating. You never need to worry about the way somebody else lives their life.

All you can do is control you own actions, you own breath. Your own thoughts. Your own speech. And that is enough. In fact it’s more than enough. There’s so many wonderful things you can do with those mere tools.

Let us let go of judgment. We don’t have to focus on what other people are doing with their lives. Focus on our own actions.

I remember talking with my friend Link. I used to get into a lot of arguments on the internet. A lot of them not very fruitful, kind of a waste of time.

I said to Link “I finally realized I don’t have to take responsibility for other people being correct or whatever. If they’re wrong, I can just let them be wrong.”

Link said “yes” and softly gently corrected me. “Another way of looking at it you can trust the divinity of other people to figure it out for themselves.”

Don’t feel like you need to judge or correct other people, you’re free. Discernment is your gift.

Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for thinking beautifully.